A Haiku for "The Darkest Hour".

If aliens invade
Cast and crew of this movie
Should be first to go

Grade: *

Speed Racer **

Director: Andy Wachowski, Larry Wachowski

Cast: Emile Hirsch, Christina Ricci

Matthew Fox, Susan Sarandon, John Goodman

Paulie Litt, Benno Fürmann, Roger Allam

The good news: the Wachowski brothers have made a faithful adaptation of the 1960's famous Japanese anime series.

The bad news is that this adaptation is so true to its source that it even acquired its sense of irrelevance, dullness and an idea of fake nostalgia powered by the same sense of expectation that made it popular during its era.

Story goes something like this, Speed (Hirsch) is the second son of the Racer family. Since he was a little kid he's been obsessed with cars, no wonder considering his whole family has been in the business forever. When he grows up he becomes a professional racer trying to live up to his, deceased, brother Rex's legacy.

His life, when he's not racing, pretty much consists of his interactions with his family. Pops (Goodman) is a jolly, overprotective man, Mom (Sarandon) is a perky, barely there female role model.

There's also his youngest, mischievous, brother Spirtle (Litt) who's always getting in trouble with his pet chimpanzee Chim Chim, loyal family mechanic Sparky (Kick Gurry) and Speed's girlfriend Trixie (Ricci), a feisty racer herself, who bats her eyelashes whenever she needs to prove her own driving abilities or when trying to get Speed out of the chastity they live in.

After his great performance in several races, Speed gets contacted by Royalton (Allam) a corrupt corporation owner who offers to sponsor him in exchange for wealth beyond his imagination.

When Speed refuses, Royalton tries to take his career down, leading the hero to team up with the mysterious Racer X (Fox) in order to uncover an evil plot, compete in the Grand Prix and live up to having a movie named after him.

The ultimate in CGI extravaganzas, the Wachowski brothers create a complete, saccharin infused universe made out of colorful buildings, video game like skies and camera flashes.

Somewhere in the middle of this we're supposed to catch the jaw dropping races all the characters keep referring to, but what we see is mostly flashing, "whoosh"es and our watches as the film extends to a luxurious, and unjustifiable, 135 minute running time.

The cast does its best to play the flat part of anime characters, with Ricci and especially Fox (who combines angst, sexiness and raw manliness in completely unexpected ways) stealing each of their scenes.

Hirsch might come off as one of the biggest problems since he never becomes more than the cartoon character. His heroic qualities come to him by default as we never feel the spark that makes him want to race so much.

He talks about it and his concentrated frown seems to be tailor made for us to realize he's going through some deep enlighting process, but Hirsch is as wooden and distant as anyone from "The Matrix".

Then again, wasn't the original Speed Racer the exact same way? Hirsch might be in fact giving a good performance that we're unable to enjoy because the character he's playing isn't worthy of being emulated.

A confusing experience, in more than one way, the Wachowski brothers try to deliver a political essay that talks about the dangers of capitalism.

But what exactly do they have to say for themselves when they try to shove this into a multimillion summer blockbuster?

Even more, how can they justify these thoughts when they go and use Speed in the very same way they condemn their characters for trying to do.

To the Wachowskis, Speed Racer is nothing more than a commodity; a perfect excuse to try out their new technological gadgets while underestimating an audience that needs much more than speed.

For teenagers "Speed Racer" doesn't come near to delivering the thrills and excitement they get from being the heroes behind the wheel, in real life or in the ever more realistic video games that are released every week.

Plus, when they're playing they don't need to go through the characters' unsufferable line readings and emotionless actions.

For little kids the experience might feel more like a mission to go through than any fun and for parents who might worry their kids will suffer some kind of seizure with the cornucopia of color and movemement, watching the film will probably be more about keeping an eye out on their children. But they not need worry, for "Speed Racer" drags so much that they'll be long asleep before any risky sequences.

For a movie that brags so much about being driven as opposed to merely driving, "Speed Racer" is often in urgent need of a tow.

Into the Wild ***

Director: Sean Penn
Cast: Emile Hirsch
Marcia Gay Harden, William Hurt, Jena Malone
Catherine Keener, Vince Vaughn, Hal Holbrook

After graduating from Emory University, Christopher McCandless (Hirsch) donates his savings to OXFAM and leaves on a journey to Alaska where he intends to live without the hypocrisy of society and the evil within materialism.
Along the way, he meets people that influence him and his attempt at some sort of postmodern enlightment becomes instead a moving, ultimately tragic, rite of passage.
The film features some of the most beautiful, poetic images shot on the American wilderness reminiscent of the great, generation-shaping, road movies of the 70s.
Led by what is an obviously demanding lead performance by Hirsch, the plot takes its time to win over you, mostly because it isn't trying to do that at all.
At first McCandless comes off looking like a selfish brat with idealistic dreams. He is condescending to the people he meets and most of the time acts as if his presence and example should be taken as some divine message.
Hirsch conveys this convincingly precisely because he doesn't act like some cult leader, but possesses a cockiness that makes everybody believe in what he thinks.
Considering that most of the film consists of Hirsch hunting, swimming, building fires and all other kinds of survival activities, his performance never exhausts you.
Slowly though his venture begins to shift into more of a revenge fueled by pride and anger. The plot accuses his parents (played by Hurt and Gay Harden who both make the most out of their limited roles) of being the reason why he fled "normal" life, but Hirsch easily avoids easily detectable motivations and remains so enigmatic that by the end, the pain his parents caused on him shifts from being perceived as weakness and arrogance, turning into the kind of excuses people come up with to cope with unbearable loss.
The supporting performances make up a beautiful collage that includes Keener as a grieving, hippie mother and Vaughn as a rowdy farmer.
But just as the film is coming off as a selfgratifying ode to McCandless' narcissism, Hal Holbrook appears playing Ron Franz, an army veteran who finds in Chris both the youth he lost and the chance to make it right again.
A performance that carries sorrow and loneliness, Holbrook gives the last act a heart that isn't coercive, but possesses the kind of wisdom that counterpoints everything the young man feels to be true.
If good actors are measured by the way you wish you could influence their character's fate, then Holbrook is among the best.
At the center of it all, other than the fact that it is based on a true story, what ends up affecting you the most is the palpable truth that director Sean Penn found in the film.
One could say that McCandless' pride can be compared to the way in which we perceive Penn.
Like its character the film begins with a self assuredness that makes it seem almost invincible, whether you care about what it's saying or not.
The adventure is terrifying, but you can't help but admire Chris, and Penn's crew, for going to such places to deliver cheap philosophy.
And just when it's about to turn all forcedfully transcendental on you, the whole mood of the film shifts into a meditative place that make us wonder if this is necessarily at all.
While the beauty of the outdoors is undeniable, it is no coincidence that most of the beauty found here lies in the people who go and capture it for us to see.
When McCandless is ultimately "betrayed" by that he thought would never harm him, instead of feeling like poetic irony of a feral kind, the events remind us that there is beauty to be found in both wildernesses: the one untouched by humans and the other one, where skyscrapers and corporations still harbor some kind of hope.